Approval. Approval. Approval pending.
This week I’ve been swimming in a sea of approvals. I should be back floating through these offers for new services, resting and rejoicing, but I’m doggy paddling, trudging through these confirmations of reality.
With each approval comes a paper confirmation of Charlie’s severity. I am so grateful for all the services Charlie has been approved for, but every time the doctor, therapist, or county worker checks the box “lifelong”, it stings.
Through the sting, I am rejoicing for all the help that is being offered, but I guess that’s the point: these approvals for services confirm the great needs that Charlie is living with.
A year after his diagnosis, I am still grappling with the fact that Autism is lifelong. It is not a quick fix. I constantly struggle with the vastness of his needs, but I’m thankful for all the therapies presented to us. I will do my best to ignore the sting and ache and will continue to praise God for these approvals for care that Charlie so urgently needs, but sometimes the approvals hurt.